If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
