i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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