someone get that fucking seahorse.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
This is the high leading the old right now
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
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