giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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