sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Randomize
