I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Randomize
