So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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