I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
