I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize