Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Randomize
