I need help removing her.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
