i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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