He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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