Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Randomize
