cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
I lost the right to judge tonight
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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