yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
