I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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