Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Randomize
