4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
