The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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