I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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