It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
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