Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize
