When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
