would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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