I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Randomize
