Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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