in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Randomize
