Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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