garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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