You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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