Too much gin, very little bucket
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
