I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
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