so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
