On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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