no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize