were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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