Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize