Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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