My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
