i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
