If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
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