The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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