Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
