I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
