Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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