I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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