How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
