billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Randomize
