He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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