I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
