the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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