Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
