last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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